trying by not trying

leaving it alone
grows on me.

if i ignore my obsessions
for long enough
they become the things
that i'm putting off
instead of that compulsion
that i'm giving in to.

i've wrapped comfort around me
and over my eyes.
sometimes a cocoon feels right.
like i'm
sleeping
recharging
regaining HP.

i don't need to worry
over things that aren't things.
i don't need to carry
these doubts on my shoulders.

Damn, I love to sleep

I'm tired
And nothing can ease
This useless worry
Like the warm promise
Of a long sleep
The release of drifting down
Into the soft folds
Of dreams
Buried beneath a mess of blankets
Surrendering to darkness
Fade out
Fade
Out
Faaaade

Stupid list (or, Observations of Things That Suck)

• Time constraints
• Apathy and numbness during a picturesque fall afternoon
• The loneliness of living in a world where telepathy isn't a thing
• Caring about things that may not exist
• These socks are very soft and pretty but do not keep my feet warm -- useless
• Everything is always the same. Even when it's not... really, it still is
• The discomfort of not knowing
• Everything is so heavy
• Too much time spent working toward an elusive Something, not enough time spent soaking in moments that are real
• This list feels stupid