angst

I'll never wash clean of

the saltwater trail, like

snail tracks down my cheek

a badge of honor for the weak

I'm a freak for watching too 

close, too much, only want to 

know how touch would feel

make me reel, so dizzy for contact

lame, unsure how to act, no good at

this game anymore, so sure that

adore with seep through my pores

expose my soul where in secret grows

a weedy garden of needy prose, where

pleasure & pain flow like rain through

the dream cluttered gutters of my

brain, I scream a silent refrain of

mistakes through my dreams, where

everything I want seems so far away

on the highest shelf out of reach, I've

had to teach myself to wait, because

fate will deliver someday

Any Way He Can

 I breathe

forgiveness

into your mouth

my bruises aren't real

when I'm this far gone

I'm passed out alone

you take

what you want

with no one to stop you

I'm yours until dawn

now I can't pretend

I don't feel the pain

from your lying

and your hitting

when there's no bond

to hold you to me 

or make you stay

you only want

to use me when

you're this far gone

don't tell her

you say, before you

leave my bed, while

my head is reeling and

my legs are sore

you act for a 

week as if nothing

has happened before

the booze has you

begging for more

when i tell you no

I hope that it hurts

but it never makes

me feel that I'm

less of a whore 

so you took what you 

wanted and left me in

chaos before you 

walked out of

my door