The sheets have a weird
Burnt smell
I washed them
Yesterday
And they smell
Burnt
I'm still lying
In them
Willing my hands
Away from my phone
It's 2:14 in the afternoon
I haven't showered
Am still in
Pajama
Pants
I'm making
Mental lists
Of how to be
Healthy
How to feel
Normal
Imagine myself
Outside
I feel healthier
Already
I'm still lying
On the burnt smelling sheets
Hand still on phone
Waiting for me
To do something
Like it's up to
Some other power
To puppet me around
I can hear the
JG Wentworth commercial
From down the hall
I'm irritated that
I'm singing the phone number
After it's over.
My fingernails
Are
Dirty.
My hair even
Feels gray.
It's easy
Focusing on
Small things
Tiny
Imperfections
Ignoring the obvious
Weight of life
Keeping me
In Bed.