indigestion

my poor bed is 

holding up so much 

weight tonight.

those swallowed 

maybes

slid down smooth, 

yet,

given an hour 

on my back,

sank hard to form

heavy nevers & 

there's no antacid to 

cure the heart burns.

I'm certain now that 

I've digested every

salty subconscious 

thought

devoured every bit of 

alcohol left in

this house

to fill the rest

but 

I still save room

for a scream

because

there's always

room for you, 

sweets. 

life right now

I just apologized

for simply existing

& this was actually

accepted.

Dude, I was being

dramatic, 

you're not supposed to 

just roll with it.

*

Twelve minutes until

my shift starts, 

I am staring at the 

front entrance

from my parked car.

I really feel how

easy it would be to just

quit at everything.

*

I just choked on the 

water that I drank to 

keep myself from 

choking.

This is what 

happens when 

I try to help 

myself.

*

I am watching the moon

fall into a red shadow

in a clear night. This must

hold some magic,

so I wished on the

eclipsing moon, two

shooting stars, &

apparently 

an airplane.

I believe in nothing

& everything

tonight.